31 October 2013

Happy Halloween!!

Will the real Amanda Bynes please stand up?

25 October 2013

My Open Love Letter to Nick Miller

Did you watch this week's New Girl? I am obsessed with the show, so obviously I did. And boy, am I glad I tuned in! Nick Miller disclosed an old email account of his! He doesn't use it that often though. Its activity is based on the highs and lows of his roomie Schmidt. Jess brought the account back to life to salvage her Halloween party from an awkward meeting between Schmidt and his ex/Jess's BFF Cece. The email account is keatonpotatoes@aol.com (AOL? Sooo vintage!).

This is my big chance ya'll. I have an open line of communication to Nick, and I totes seized the moment. Pasted below is the email chain!
Hi hi Nick Miller!
I know this is kinda stalker-ish, but I got your email while watching New Girl. I just wanted to let you know that I think you're really attractive and like many adorkable fans across the country, I have a major crush on you! And just when I thought I couldn't crush on you more, you reveal your very foodie email. Which means, we have soooo much in common because I am a great cook! We are totes soul mates.
You're obviously a big fan of potatoes, so here are some of my favorite potato recipes if you're hungry! I usually wait until the 5th date to make a guy dinner, but I'll let you skip the formalities because I know it ain't your thang. How do these delicious dishes sound??
A classic buttery potato gratin!
An Italian-style Chef salad with the most delicious potato salad you ever did taste!
I can't remember if you're Jewish or not, but these crispy and chewy latkes are perfect! I love them, and I'm Asian!
And the ultimate comfort food... roasted garlic mashed potatoes... with real roasted garlic!
So if you ever need a side dish to your Jess, you have my email and my twitter account below for a good meal! Or if you ever want to play a game of hot potato! ;)
"Whoooo's that girl?...
It's JEN!"
-- Jennifer Pham
He responded immediately! Like within 0 minutes! Guys respond immediately when they're interested. But if he responded so fast, was he able to click on all my hyperlinks?!
How many times have you seen "Multiplicity?"
-- Keaton
I responded back:
ZERO! (teehee, satire!)
But also, I know you're not really Michael Keaton. You don't have to play games with me Nick Miller!
No response. I haven't heard back from him. And just like that, we lost our momentum and possibly the greatest love affair of our lives. Until next Tuesday...

21 October 2013

How to Successfully Eat at Bistro Petit

Who says I'm flaky, forgetful and don't follow through with my projects? The answer is everyone by the way.

But alas, the full moon has come and I finally got a chance to wine and dine at Bistro Petit! And it was fun! And delicious! And most importantly, painless!

On a fateful Saturday date night with my sister, we headed out with ambitious plans to grab dinner at BP and see "Enough Said." This dining experience was different from last. This time, we had an in. My sister's co-worker's fiancé is the chef at Bistro Petit. Which means there was some major bon appetit-ing at Bistro Petit!

So how do you successfully eat at Bistro Petit? Here's my guide:

1. So yes, we did know the Chef. But that didn't mean he was willing to kick out his current customers in the middle of their meal just so his two favorite Asian sistas could have a table. But hey, they have a wait staff now! A girl with a seemingly French accent will happily seat you. Merci! Not only have they expanded their staff, but BP has expanded their seating area! There are now colorful tables and chairs outside for you to dine al fresco. The only problem is that we can't drink outside due to liquor licenses. But our lovely waitress suggested that we order while enjoying the crisp fall weather and when a table opens up inside, our food will be ready and waiting for us to wash it down with our booze. Which brings me to my next tip...

2. Bring a bottle of vino! And water! The no tap water is real people! It's BYOB and the "B" for beverage is all-inclusive. There is sparkling water, which doesn't really quench a thirst like good ol' flat water. But Frenchie will happily bring you cups of ice so that your bottled water is ice cold. She will also bring you a bucket of ice to keep your Prosecco chilled. Brrrrrr!

3. Now after all that vino and agua, you'll for sure need to relieve yourself. No more visits to the bodega next door! There is a bathroom downstairs. I did not go personally because I planned ahead and went before we left the apartment, but I imagine it to be very petit by New York standards. Baño Petit!

4. Don't spend all your stripping money. BP will feed you one of the best meals of your life in exchange for your cold hard cash. #cha-ching

5. The food is excellent. And each dish was brought out by the Chef himself! Now that was special treatment. Our meal in photos...

My sister and I shared the Spicy Pomme Frites with homemade ketchup! I freaking love ketchup. So that little ramekin was not enough. I needed at least two more!

My main entree was the Truffle Mushroom Risotto. I don't even like risotto. But everyone was saying this was a must-have. And they were right. My main complaint about normal risotto is that it's mushy. Apparently, the secret to a non-mushy risotto is to use farro, instead of arborio rice. A culinary genius!

Sister inhaled her kimchi bouillabaisse and proclaimed that it was the best meal of her life. It's the most popular dish off the menu. So if you love seafood, this is your bucket of happiness.

After all that rich and delicious food, we made a last minute decision to not order dessert. Even though I had my eye on the Fresh Cinnamon Beignets. Another day, another dessert right? Wrong. Chef brought out the freshly fried treats for us. That third hand is Neta, Chef's lady lover and Sister's co-worker. Hi Neta! Thank you for joining our donut toast! Side note: Carbo-loading for a movie is hard ya'll.

Aside from the food, everyone at Bistro Petit (even the patrons!) was the nicest! Before Chef came out to chat with us after the dinner rush, he stopped by to talk to his other happy eaters that he didn't even know. How many chefs in the NYC area do you know that do that? I can only count one right now! Chef's lady lover came and visited while we ate, so we all had a nice long leisurely chat to go with our deliciously long leisurely dinner. Which made us miss our movie. So my final tip would be to set aside some time because fortunately, this ain't no fast food chain and it doesn't taste like it either!

This happy and stuffed jen pham will for sure come back again!